Common Ground
by lizard-senpai
Summary: In which I am a severely underpowered idiot with a backpack of incriminating evidence and a language barrier to deal with. Yay me.
1. Chapter 1

**1: In which I die**

Dying sucks. I mean, no shit, right? You're _dying_ , of course it sucks. But you can't truly find the horrible extent of death until you experience it first hand. It's the end of everything; loved ones, hobbies, aspirations, everything that made you a person is just gone. And, for me at least, it wasn't as instantaneous as people make it out to be.

I was on my bathroom floor, bleeding out all over the goddamn place and freaking out because I had never seen so much of my own blood before and dizzy even though I was sitting down because _no shit_ I'm losing cups of blood by the second. And let me tell you, it is the strangest feeling to see your own blood, to see it oozing out of you, and to not feel it because the stinging pain has given way to numbness.

All I could think about was how crappy it would be to get my blood out of the grout and shower curtains and how glad I was that I didn't have to be the one to do it. Then I realized that it was either Drew or Noah who would be cleaning up my blood and then I had the good conscious to feel guilty. That was about it.

Fear and anxiety and selfishness and then it faded to black. All I could think about was that at least I wasn't going to be the one to have to clean up after this mess.

Yeah, I know you're probably thinking I'm an idiot or just a selfish bitch (actually, both of those things do apply to me a solid 68% of the time, so you're mostly right) but I'm all around kind of a fuck up, but at least I was was kinda justified. I was dying in my bathroom because I'm the idiotic little sister no one wanted yet my brothers got stuck taking care of.

I was bleeding, dying, then slowly gone. I stop existing and I stopped being. So forgive when I sound selfish or lazy or whatever the fuck else, 'cause honestly I am. Only this time, I had a reason to be.

Dying sucked. Being dead sucked significantly less and was a helluva lot easier that being alive ever was. Boring as hell, too hence why I'm not going to talk about.

Now, maybe this is the time to give you a bit of exposition. Fascinating shit, I know. Please hold in your enthusiasm. I like this as much as you do, but 'tis a necessary act of villainy.

My name's Lizzie, last name completely irrelevant. I was a fifteen-year-old waste of space who watched too much anime, read too much fanfiction, and still am generally the most lazily hard-working people in existence. I was raised by my older brothers (who are eleven and thirteen years older than me if you're wondering) and ditched by just about everyone else. Not that I blame them, I'd try to ditch my cynically depressing ass first chance I got.

There, expositing done because I am literally too lazy to give you this information later. That, and well dying makes your memories as blurry as my vision without glasses, and that's just God awful. That's why I'm writing it now, before I forget and won't be able to give you any info about me from before I died. Hell, my life before wasn't too interesting but it was mine and I want to at least be able to remember the basics when all is said and done.

Okay, I'm done bellyaching. You came here for some action, right? Or an OC to impose yourself upon on this magical feel-good adventure I should be writing. Well, action is unavoidable, considering the dumbasses I got myself landed with, but this story isn't the feel-good type because I'm not a feel-good person. I'm a pessimistic, cynical teenager with more angst than I know what to do with, so I keep all my happy moments in a ziplock baggie in my backpack like I'm a second-rate crack dealer.

So, as your fictitious drug dealer, I'm giving you a good time before the inevitable regret of your life choices.

Here's the good shit; once I died (ugh) I got to live out every fangirl's dream. I got transported to my favourite anime by a ROB. Basically, the start of all SI-OC fanfics where Mary Sue hooks up with Anime Hottie #3 and they ride into the sunset after over the top agnst. Sounds great, right?

Yeah, lol, nope. Fanfiction sure as fuck didn't prepare me for the shit storm I got dumped into. Random omnipotent being dropping me into an anime? Try a demon fucking with my boring afterlife because we both thought it was a grand idea at the time. Me hooking up with an anime hottie? Ha! Hahahahaha! Yeah, right. I am so socially awkward that I get tongue-tied around my brothers, men who I have lived with literally since my birth. Add in the fact that I was fifteen upon getting dumped here, and we get the added bonus of pedophilia in just about any romantic scenario.

No, here's what happened. See, I'm not too smart (*gasp*) and I like to piss people off. I don't discriminate, either. Drew, my eldest brother, liked to joke around that when I died, god and the Devil would flip a coin on where I landed because neither would want to have me pissing them off for all eternity. I swear Drew could see my future at times.

The devil lost the coin toss, by the way.

Well, anyways, it turns out complaining about being bored to an equally bored demon just for funsies isn't a great idea. As it turns out, demons hate people complaining. My conversation with Rob (yes, his name is actually Rob) went something like this:

"Dear god, why is being dead so boring?" I had asked, for the 49th time, according to Rob. He glared at me and I ignored him. That didn't go over well with him, but nothing I did ever went over well with him.

Me and Rob had a special kind of friendship; the kind in which both parties hate each other but are forced to communicate out of sheer proximity and nothing else. Rob was the poor bastard who got assigned to babysitting duty, as I wasn't truly a member of Hell. God didn't want me corrupting all the pure innocent cinnamon rolls he had chilling with him though, so that meant I got to hang out with the cool kids. Demons.

" _Fuck me,_ you've only been here fifteen days! How the actual fuck do you intend to deal with the rest of your afterlife, which, might I remind you, is forever?!" Demons don't like complaining, but apparently, they themselves are exempt from the rule of dislike. Rob, in particular, loved to complain; about me, hell, and Jesus. Especially me. Like, he would write you a whole series of encyclopedia to all of my worst traits and still not be done complaining about me. I mean, I could probably do the same if pressed, but I wouldn't because I'm lazy. Rob would probably do it just for shits and giggles, the over-accomplishing asstard.

"Do _not_ act like you aren't bored too," I said with an accusatory finger waved in his ugly face. Demons are not pretty. They look like gargoyles, if those gargoyles all got into a bar fight, went home to survive a house fire, and then went to fight in the Vietnam war, all within the course of an hour. With this in mind, Rob is nightmare inducing, even by demon standards.

Yeah, he ain't pretty.

He's even less pretty when a smirk appears on his face, taking the place of a lava freezing glare, starting off small and then growing until his hideous smile, complete with an underbite, is splitting his face. I swear to you, I am not hyperbolizing when I say it was a chilly day in hell when Rob smiled. It dropped, like, fifty degrees Fahrenheit.

"Well," he had drawled and I finally realized my mistake. And though I wasn't quite sure what he had in mind for me, I knew it was bad from how he spoke, "I guess I have been kind of _bored_."

"U-uh hey, um, how 'bout we play Uno?" I stuttered, hating emphasis he put on 'bored.' As it turned out, my backpedaling did not change my fate. Kinda glad, though. I've always have had shit luck at Uno.

"Oh, come on Lizzie. You said it yourself: we're both bored. Now tell me, kiddo. What's that show you always talk about? The one with the pirates and the kid with the silly hat?"

 _One Piece_ , I had thought before I could catch myself and apparently Rob read my thoughts because he said with malicious humour and unnatural cheer, "Oh yes! One Piece."

As I said before, complaining about being bored to demons isn't a great idea.

 **A/N: So, I decided I might as well try my hand at an SI-OC. Yeah, I'm already regretting my life choices so, so very much. Welp, review to tell me how crappy or uncrappy this was. See you in the next millennium, where I might post another chapter lol.**

 **~Lizard-senpai**


	2. Chapter 2

**2: In which I am saved by my screensaver**

Okay, so have any of you woken up in a cold sweat, thinking you're late to school/work, only to realize it's your day off and you woke up for no goddamn reason? Yeah, well then let's pretend that you go back to bed and everything is fine only to remember you are late for something else equally terrible, like your flight to a tropical vacation to Hawaii. Take that initial feeling of oh fuck, amplify by ten to the second power, and we get what it feels like to be ditched in a fictional universe.

Yes! Truly, a marvelous experience.

Yet, even in this veritable shitshow that Rob decided to gift me with, the universe chose to make my grand entrance as crappy as possible. And damn, the universe _does not_ do thing half-assed. Hence why, as I roughly landed on splintering wood, I felt a stinging pain in my arms that sure as fuck didn't come from a splinter.

Blood. My blood was everywhere. Seeping through the thin fabric of my hoodie emblazoned with the _Fairy Tail_ logo. Falling in drops and splatters on the deck I had been transported to. Fucking. Everywhere.

Ladies and gentlemen, I was dying for the second time in my existence. Hell, I was dying for the second time in that month! Adding a heavy helping of insult to injury, I could hear Rob laughing his ass off as I bled out once again.

Reasonably enough, I started a full-blown panic attack, breath inhibited by fear (and the fact that I was on the brink of death) and the blood still left in my body pounding loudly in my ears.

My head swerved around frantically until I caught sight of the ugly bastard. I gave him a panicked look, not down to die again, but he just chuckled and waved me off.

"Good luck, kiddo. And don't worry, Prince Charming 'll save you. See ya around."

If I had been doing anything other than dying at that moment, I probably would have shouted at Rob to tell me what the fuck that meant. As it were, I was dying, so I had no wherewithal to ask his meaning or question why my backpack from when I was alive and school was a thing was suddenly chucked into my side. And fuck me, what did I keep in that think? Lead? Sonuvabitch, that thing was heavy.

Speaking of heavy, my eyelids, previously held open wide with panic and fear were getting heavier as I started to lose consciousness. My thoughts were something along the lines of oh hell no, I ain't repeating this bullshit, but I had zero other options than to let struggle with no success against my blood loss.

I was going to die.

I was going to fucking die.

And then warm arm and the smell of cigarette smoke wrapped around me, saying words that I couldn't understand. That seriously freaked me out, since damn, I am not doing okay if I can't make out the language. I looked up hazily, and my eyes seemed to not be completely failing me.

A really hot blonde, probably late teens, was looking down at me, fear for my well being. Oh, and said sexy blonde had a suit on and curly eyebrows. Yep. Honestly, that didn't freak me out nearly as much as it should of because my brain wasn't really processing things like it should have.

My last thoughts my frazzled brain thought were, _Damn, that is one sexy cosplayer._

-:-

So, now is the time when I'm going to give you a semi-random flashback. Honestly, this is just me stalling on giving you my first fully conscious interaction with Sanji Vinsmoke, but it also has some small modicum of value I suppose.

Okay, when I was eleven, my dad ditched Noah and me. Don't get too sad or anything, neither of us liked the guy and our lives were better without him anyway. Him leaving did earn us a whole lot of sympathy from his family though, and my grandparents bought me more stuff than I knew what to do with as some sort of consolation prize. Noah ended up selling a bunch of their shit to save up for an apartment or us, as Drew was off in Indiana doing God knows what at the time, and it was down to the middle child o our family to take care of me.

I ended up giving him a lot of the more girly or sports-related things for him to sell as well, though there was one thing I genuinely liked and kept. A laptop.

Now, at this point in time, me and Noah were religiously going to the library so I could watch One Piece on the public computers. I had been watching the show for the first time and was in love with it, so when I got my computer, I just about turned into the humanized equivalent of cocaine.

The first thing I did was go to my brother and ask him to set Sanji as my screensaver, as I was super into the character since I was watching the whole Baratie thing then. Noah made fun of me or having a crush on a fictional character, and as a result, I threw the fact that he had a crush on Sakura the Useless in his face.

He promptly shut up and set Sanji as my screensaver.

-:-

I woke up in a small but comfortable room, an unfamiliar comforter laid on top of me and a glass of water and a note on the bedside table. My glasses were there, and on the floor next to me were my teal backpack and blood-stained hoodie. For about half a second, I was confused, wondering how the fuck I had gotten there and if maybe I was at one of Noah's friend's house.

And then I remembered the whole death thing and complaining to Rob and HOLY FUCK SANJI VINSMOKE HAD RESCUED ME!

I may or may not have shrieked and fallen off of the twin mattress. But seriously, can you fucking blame me?! I would have to revoke my own membership to the _One Piece_ fan community if I _hadn't_ fangirled in such a situation. And honestly, who wouldn't freak the hell out at being rescued by their goddamned screensaver? My reaction was perfectly reasonable, thank you very much!

Unfortunately, my crap luck dictates that for every awesome moment of realization, there must be an equally shitty one. Or several, rather.

The first was that son of a bitch, I hurt. Like, nothing compared to this. Not even the time Drew had decided I was grown enough to have a beer (or six) and had a hangover the next morning. Not even when it was that time of the month and my uterus was attempting suicide. Repeatedly. Not even when I had walked home three miles in a blizzard with a broken ankle. Yeah, don't ask about that last one.

The second was that my shriek and newfound acquaintance with the floor had freaked out the people on lower floors as two men came into the room. One of them who was none other than my screensaver. And damn, two-dimensions doesn't do the man justice. He is fucking hot! He had this suave, badass vibe to him, even with panic on his face. It was probably the cigarette. _Wait, no! Damn it, he's almost an adult!_ My conscious told me. My hormones were effectively ignoring that teensy-tiny detail, however.

And then, there was three.

Sanji, an unwarranted amount of concern on his face for a stranger, spoke. Why is that a bad thing, you ask? Well, him speaking in and of itself wasn't a bad thing. In fact, his voice was quite pleasant. No, it was what he was saying that made me want to murder the world and the demon who sent me there.

Seriously though, it made sense. _One Piece_ is from Japan. It made sense for the people of its world to speak Japanese

 **A/N: New chapter, y'all. And amazingly, it didn't take forever! I'm so proud of myself ^.^ Anyways, I'd like to thank everyone who has followed, favorited, or reviewed. I really want to thank MajorCartooniac for the long review. I totally agreed with you btw, why are all OCs perfectly capable adults? It's so much more fun to make unadjusted teenagers suffer. Well, as always, feel free to review. They always make me happy, even flames. Flames just mean you took the time to read and critique, so it shows you care. Hope you enjoyed!**

 **~Lizard-senpai**


	3. Update

AN UPADATE FOR ALL OF MY FICS:

I have decided that I'm going to give up writing fanfiction in favour of focusing on my original works. I still enjoy writing fanfiction, but I don't really have the time nor energy to focus on all the projects here. On top of that, my writing style has changed drastically as of late, and keeps evolving at a very fast pace. Since I'm generally slow to update, there tend to be gaps between my style that are caused by how long it's been since I've written a story.

This isn't saying that I'm completely giving up on writing fanfiction, since I might update things sporadically/as the mood strikes me, but I am giving the warning that I might in the future.

Thank you for your support of these stories. It really means a lot to me.

~Lizard-senpai


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